Tag Archives: fun

Scenes from DC #MarchforScience

Vision of Fish (karaoke lyrics)

Paracheilinus carpenteri

(sing to the tune of “Vision of Love” by Mariah Carey)

(hmmmmmmmmmmmm . . . [crashing waves and seagulls cawing] . . .)

First vertebrate
So slippery
Underwater respiration
In the rivers and lakes and the sea

Body so long
Streamlined and free
Somehow you just keep on swimming
Suspension without gravity

I had a vision of fish
And it was all that ichthyology

Prayed for a bite
Felt a few tugs
Casting my line in the water
Hoping for something I love
There was no bait
There was no hook
And then I dove in the ocean
I’m looking for snapper and schnook

I had a vision of fish
And it was all that ichthyology
I had a vision of fish
And it was all ichthyology

I’ve realized I’m blue, (so blue)
We are one and the same
The water is our food
You’ve got your fins,
I’m dependent on my limbs too
The distance between us is just ballyhoo

You’re vertebrate kind, (yeah)
Deep destiny, (and the water you breathe)
And though separated by fathoms
We are together and free, (swam through the night)
Swam through the night, (so slippery)
So slippery, (slippery)
Knowing the world is my oyster
And all fish are my family (need my family)

I had a vision of fish, [whale & dolphin chirps]
And it was all that ichthyology
I had a vision of fish
And it was all … that ich-thyology

 

My photos from DC Women’s March

For more photos of signs, check out My favorite signs at the Women’s March on Washington from The Washington Post.

Review of Dave Barry’s new book “Best.State.Ever.”

29093310The best thing about humorist Dave Barry’s new book is the title. With a mocking and adolescent tone, the title has literal and interpretive meanings that allow us to giggle about Florida truly as the best of states, the worst of states, and a quixotic state of mind. The book neither proves nor disproves a literal achievement of “best state” (a game showing waiting to happen) but it does entertain in typical, good-natured Dave Barry fashion.

As a fellow Floridian, I enjoyed following Dave’s drives around the state to storied tourist attractions and aging oddities, but much of it was old news. The most revealing chapter covered a retirement community in central Florida (shocking, I know) where people dance until they die (Best.Twist.Ever.). Although sarcastic and knowingly hyperbolic, Dave laughs while still managing to empathize with his subject of old people in a fish bowl. They are too easy to catch and throw back, yet there’s some charm and whimsy to this fish tank, where Dave would never want to live—but now he understands why so many do.

img_2954Other chapters have him driving to Key West to get drunk (shocking) and to Weeki Wachee Springs to see real mermaids (bucket list material). These chapters are like shooting fish in a barrel—they’re just too easy, and they’ve become clichés. Old-school, unfiltered Florida is obviously “the best.” Where’s today’s Florida of competitive commercialization? He visits the trendiest of night clubs in South Beach and gives it too much credit. Boring. I wanted him to rip it like he did in his Miami Herald column on Santa’s Enchanted Forest, a pathetic Miami attraction and multi-layered oxymoron, which deserves an annual reading.

The book “Best.State.Ever.” is fun and fluffy. I certainly agree that Florida deserves the crown for info-tainment, and I challenge any other state to even try to snatch the title. Such mind games are a breezy, harmless distraction from the actual state of our states.

It’s also refreshing to have PG-rated humor in an X-rated world. Our states hold great potential for humor, but our nation is really pushing the boundaries. Considering the state of U.S. politics, the book Dave should be writing right now is “Best.Nation.Ever.” We are killing it.  quote-a-printer-consists-of-three-main-parts-the-case-the-jammed-paper-tray-and-the-blinking-dave-barry-121-5-0562

 

Make Fun Poems with Trump Tweets

Here’s a fun way to make very timely poems. Simply reorder Trump’s published words by following these rules:

  1. Select a week of Trump Tweets.
  2. Use 1 phrase/word per line, including punctuation as provided in the Tweet. No alteration, repetition, or additional punctuation allowed.
  3. You may provide an original title to poem.

Here’s an example to help you get started.

"Patsy Cline" 

Very strange!
People
extremely dangerous people
must ask for Federal help!
Julian
Jackie
Bill
was so careless
The "Intelligence" briefing
is record setting
so-called "Russian hacking"
was delayed until Friday, perhaps
Some people just don't understand the "Movement"
onto the battlefield.
Assange
Clinton
(Arizona)
shooting victims
build a case.
General Motors
must remember that
If the Mayor can't do it
"a 14 year old could have hacked Podesta"
or pay big border tax!
Mexican made
album sales have skyrocketed after announcing
it is not affordable -
There should be no further releases
"CRAZY"

(created from Trump Tweets, first week of January 2017)